


A Lost Angel

by Tatergattler



Category: Doki Doki Literature Club! (Visual Novel)
Genre: F/F, Of course things get gay the moment two girls are alone together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-17
Updated: 2019-02-18
Packaged: 2019-08-25 02:29:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,069
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16652566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tatergattler/pseuds/Tatergattler
Summary: Sayori gets what she wanted.It's for the best...Right..?....r-right..?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Tbh, I had this written on my phone for a long while. Just decided to post to demonstrate the fact that I am in fact not in some coma (Tho my sleep schedule may be)
> 
> Nothing like some good ol angst ah?
> 
> (((I do have a second part written up for this, but I'm not going to post it unless I figure out how I want this whole drabble to end, so for now, this is all you're getting.)))

I blinked my eyes open.

Everything felt cold. Dull. Numb. Like I've been wrapped in a dozen, frozen blankets.

I took a deep breath. I could breathe... Something was wrong.

My mind flashed to moments of panic.

Of fear.

Of regret.

Of struggle.

...I think I know what happened but...

...

A figure phased through the wall. Black, imposing, a phantasmic skull for a face.

They approached and...I would've said my pulse quickened but...

The skull's expression was... Upset..? Sad? Can skulls show emotion? They reached out with their bony hands and gently wrapped them around my neck. My hands reactively jumped up and gripped those wrists, trying to wrangle them away. 

No! Nono, not this again! Why??

"Shhhh... Calm, young one." A voice ushered. It sounded mature, calm, almost... Motherly.

I felt something nudge a bit before I slowly floated to the ground like a paper, lost in the wind. Nothing felt real.

Especially when I can see my body hanging right there above me.

Lifeless. Pale.

I instantly burst into tears. I couldn't stop it.

My life had ended.

That's what I wanted, right?

Why am I so upset then?

Why do I regret so much??

...Was it really for the best?

I don't know how long I've been crying, but when I managed to get a hold of myself, that black figure was hugging me, comforting me...

...I gently pressed my hands against them and they parted without any protest. I needed space to pull myself together again...

...

"W-who....who are you?" I croaked out. My voice was choppy, coarse, but it sounded ethereal.

The figure paused, those black, empty eye holes studying me for a moment.

"...A guide. And a shoulder to lean on."

"...You're.... You're Death... Aren't you..?"

"...No. That is my job..." The figure looked away. "My name is irrelevant, young one. I serve as a guide for those whose stories have come to an end. Whether it be happily, or..." They looked at me. "Tragically."

"...So...I really am.... Dead now..."

"I am afraid so."

"...Ehee, I finally guess I got what I wanted. The sweet embrace of death..."

The figure turned to me surprised. "Yet you look extremely upset."

I didn't respond. Nor did I try to make eye contact... If that was possible.

"...Child...I am no stranger to goodbyes. This is not a happy job." They got up, wandering around my room. Inspecting my teddy bear... Admiring the posters I had lying about... "Those who end their stories... I've guided an extremely upsetting amount of those like you... Each one, a different story. Each one, a different reason. Each one, selfless, pure..."

My phone started vibrating... I considered reaching for it, but I hesitated. Death glanced over.

"'Monika'" They read out. Why would Monika be calling me? I reached up and my hand phased through the table...

...right...I'm dead... A glance at my hanging body only made me more upset.

"...I cannot say much else, other than, I am sorry. This world is far too cruel, too grueling. It takes who it wishes, and leaves the rest to rot." They paused, glancing out the window.

"...It's time to get going, child. The hour grows old."

"What? Why?"

"...This is the part I hate the most..."

A knock came from my bedroom door.

"...Sayori? H-hello..? You've been... Pretty elusive these past few days, everything alright..?"

I recognized that voice...

Monika...

I wanted to go. I wanted to leave right now. I didn't want to see this.

But at the same time, I couldn't move... I was... Stunned or something... I could only watch...

"...Child..." The guide ushered, a bit urgently, gesturing towards a doorway that wasn't there before.

The bedroom door cracked open gently...

"Sayo.....ri...."

I haven't bolted through any ethereal door faster in my life.

...

...

...

I blinked my eyes open and glanced around. I was I'm a comfy bed, far too big for just me, surrounded by stuffed animals, primarily cats... This was not my room...

The door opened gently and the Guide poked their head in.

"Oh, good." They murmured and entered the room. "Child, this is your new home."

...I didn't ask for a new home...

"I...realize that this is all still abrupt, but... This area will change as you see fit. The only thing I cannot do for you is... Well, solve the loneliness issue."

I just nodded.

"...Do you have any questions, or opinions, you wish to share?"

I shook my head.

"....Very well. I must be off. Do not hesitate to call for assistance at anytime. I shall do what I can."

And with that, they left.

I blinked a few times before laying back down. I caught a glimpse of a halo over my head...

The only thing on my mind was Monika and her reaction...

It was for the best, Sayori...

It was for the best...


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well...uh.
> 
> Here you go..??
> 
> I guess????

The ink flows into a dark puddle...

Just...move your hand...

Write away your fears and doubts...

...

But in this world past the tragic ending..

...

...

What would it take just to dampen all the pain...? 

...

...

I leaned back in my chair a bit too far that I kinda fell backwards.

I blinked the dizzy and stars away and just stared at the ceiling. 

Notes on day one of the afterlife... Stuff's boring... Really, really boring.

...No phone...

...I wonder what my friends are doing...

Or, what they would be doing if... Nothing major happened.

Oh, who am I kidding, my death isn't really that major, is it..?

Right.... Right...

Why am I rethinking this stuff... It already happened. I can't change the past.

I'm...

...I was so sure when I was alive...

Why am I only filled with regret..?

...

...

...

...

A few soft noises crossed my ears, making me open my eyes...

My vision was blurred with a groggy haze as a few soft whispers were heard.

I've been here for... Months..? I lost count... Like I was counting in the first place... Could've been days, weeks, hours, I really don't know. 

I sat up and rubbed my eyes. At least this bed was comfy... When my vision cleared, I saw a face I wasn't expecting to see. Well, two.

The Guide.

And Natsuki.

Natsuki.

Our eyes met and the moment fell cold.

"...Ah..." Was all she managed after a stagnant pause.

".......Natsuki..."

The Guide, took a small bow. "Please take care of each other." They said before backing out the room.

We didn't talk for a while.

Natsuki just sat on the other edge of the bed and we avoided eye contact.

It wasn't until almost what felt like half an hour Natsuki piped up.

"...I don't know whether to be pissed or happy." She muttered.

Way to break the ice...

"Ehee....I'm... I'm..." I had no words, honestly.

Natsuki took a deep sigh. "I... Still remember your..." She sighed again. "Monika was broken... Yuri didn't... She... She got hospitalized."

"Hospitalized..?"

"...Blood loss. She was... She..." Natsuki just made vague gestures across her wrist. I got the idea immediately.

"Oh....I...I had no idea."

"None of us did. None of us knew you had it that bad either... You were always so happy, so cheerful, it was....hard..."

"...What about you?"

"Huh?"

"Uhmm... How... Did you handle... My..."

"Oh...I... Tha-that... That.... That doesn't matter."

"...Oh.."

Another pause.

"How long have I been...well..?"

Natsuki glanced at me a moment with those dulled eyes. More hesitation. 

"...3 weeks, 4, iunno, around there..?" 

More silence. 

"...How did you end up... Here?" I asked finally, curiosity burning. "I-If that's something you're willing to share with me, that is, eheehe, you really don't--" 

Natsuki finally looked at me. Like, _at_ me. Not that half-glazed glance she shot my way moments earlier. Her eyes, emotionally drained, her arms crossed.

"...I... My.... Home life... Wasn't the best." She muttered. "Pa.... My... My father. He..." She turned away, hugging herself with her crossed arms. "He...wasn't nice."

I felt my heart sink. Well... No, I don't have a heart anymore but...

"One day, he just..." Her breath hitched and a small sob came from her.

I scooted over to gently comfort her... I didn't realize she was hurting so bad...

Natsuki leaned into me and sobbed harder.

"He hit me! Papa hit me until I was fucking numb! I was fucking numb, waist down! He kept stomping on me and kicking me, and beating me with that stupid ass alcohol bottle until it broke over my fucking head!!!" She yelled out, gently hitting my back in her frustration. "I just remember the glass breaking and feeling really fucking dizzy! I...I think I broke my neck on the edge of the counter, I--" 

Natsuki kept crying. She didn't stop. After holding up her facade for so long, she could finally let it out, but only now, after such an unfortunate incident.

"...I'm...so sorry, Natsuki... You didn't deserve any of that..."

"I know! I fucking know!! I know I didn't deserve a fucking nanometer of his shit!! But what do I do?? Nothing!! Fucking _NOTHING_!! I couldn't fight back against Papa--" She paused, her breathing full of rage and sorrow and hurt.. "Against my own fucking dad! I couldn't! I just couldn't!! And this is what I get!! _This is what I get!!!!_ " 

Natsuki's voice was loud, fuming... Her temper must be getting to her, so I did the only thing I thought would help.

I gently rubbed her back, humming some random aimless tune while leaning back, flopping onto the bed with a bawling, shaking, and broken Natsuki in my arms. 

...

...

...

Not even five minutes later, Natsuki had cried herself to sleep and was snoozing on me, her face buried in the crook of my neck. I desperately tried to ignore the closeness, as well as the warmth from her soft breaths that made me nearly shiver. I really wish being a ghost made blushing impossible... 

Problem. Like, ten minutes passed, and I'm feeling restless. I reeeally want to get up, but Natsuki's pinning me down, snoozing away like some cat... I really couldn't get out of bed without waking her up... Could I..? 

I tried shifting slightly and Natsuki instantly woke with a start and yelp, which in turn, spooked the ever living fuck out of me.

"Sorry! Sorry, sorry sorry! I really didn't mean to wake you up at all! Really!"

Natsuki rubbed her eyes and face, gently rolling off of me.

"Mmnh... It's fine... I've always been a lighter sleeper." She murmured in reply, sitting up and looking around the room, finally taking in what was there to see.

Regardless, she seems to have hid herself back behind her walls again.

I was still curious about a few things, but would it really be a good time to ask them now? I stilled as casually as I could over to the desk and plopped myself down in the chair, sighing to myself.

"Hey, if it's okay for me to ask... Why was your dad so...him?"

Natsuki turned to look at me for a few moments, almost seeming like she was calculating whether or not I was worthy to know such a thing. She sighed a split moment later, looking away, flopping back onto the bed, staring up at the ceiling.

She didn't speak up immediately, but

"Mama died... Around when I was...what, 4 or 5?" I immediately regretted asking. "Papa...blamed me for it. Said it was my fault." She scoffed. "Bullshit. I heard their fights from my room. I've seen how she flinches when he's around."

She sighed, hesitating.

"Hey, if you don't feel comfortable telling me all of this you don't have to.." I spoke up.

"Pffh, whatever. I've already started and I don't have any tears left, so whatever." She took a deep breath before continuing "B-before I go on I Ahh... Kinda have to tell you something I've kept a secret for a while now, but... May as well spill it. I can trust you."

I turned to have Natsuki my full attention. Her saying she trusts me is...really meaningful. She hardly trusted anyone back at school.

"...I'm... I'm trans."

I blinked a moment before putting on the best smile I could, and it was genuine, really.

"I...Natsuki, you... Regardless of any of that identity shenaniganery, you're one of my closest friends, I'd never turn even a shoulder just because of some weird mismatch."

Natsuki seemed to let out a small breath before blinking.

"Wait...wait Holy fuck... Holy shit!" She exclaimed, patting her crotch as if she were looking for her phone.

"Natsuki, ehee, nows not the time to--" I joked, but she cut me off

"No seriously!! I think it's gone!" She chimed excitedly, about to take a peek down her skirt before she paused and glanced up at me with a small blush and an asking expression.

I turned my head to give her a moment of privacy as she investigated.

"Oh my gosh! I-I actually have..! I..!!" Her voice cracked. Cute... "I have a puuu...pus..vagi..u-uhnm."

"Nono, don't worry, I get it I get it!" I giggled, "I'm so happy for you, Natsuki!"

"I-I'm a real girl now..."

I turned back to face her. Luckily she was all covered up again, but she was poking her chest, which was...maybe slightly bigger than I last saw her? The growth was so miniscule that it was next to impossible to tell without prior knowledge.

"Hey now." I started. "Natsuki, you've always been a real girl, living body or spirit. Just because you had a shlong or meat tube or whatever people call them these days,"

Natsuki held in a giggle.

"Youve always been a real girl to me, and I'm sure to the rest of the club too. I mean, I'll admit, I never really figured out you were going through all of that body hate stuff like that, but I've always treated you as a friend, and as a girl."

Natsuki jumped over and hugged me tightly, then backed off, brushed herself off, and cleared her throat, wiping her tears away from her face.

"Anyways, uh... Yeah, all that was another reason Pa... My father hit me like he did."

"Oh.."

She smiled brightly though, offering her hand to me.

"Anyways, enough of that, Sayo! I've missed you, so I'll be damned if we don't use this time to catch up a bit! As friends!"

I smiled, not immediately taking her hand.

"Where would be go even..?"

"Outside, duh."

"I don't know if we can even leave this room..."

"Well, only one way to find out! C'mon!" Natsuki made grabby motions at me.

"No energy thooooough..." I wasn't lying..

"Don't care! If we can leave, we're looking for some food to eat!"

"Can ghosts even eat..?"

"Stop asking questions and just c'mon, Sayo!"

...I sighed.

A change in scenery would be nice. I've been kinda dying bored in here...

I met Natsuki's gaze with a smile, looked at her hand, then grabbed it with my own.

She pulled me out of the chair and almost skipped towards the door. She was so full of energy, it was cute..!

She reached for the knob before pausing and looking back at me.

"...Together..?" I asked. She nodded.

"Together."

I grabbed the knob, her hand on mine.

We gently opened the door...


	3. Chapter 3

"...Not exactly what I was expecting, but it's a start." Natsuki hummed.

We came out into a school hallway, looking awfully familiar.

I turned and looked at the class signs.

"...We're just down the hall from the Literature Club." I spoke, a bit softer than I intended.

Natsuki turned to confirm my information and immediately started dragging me down the hall towards the club.

The door opened with no resistance and we peaked inside.

Everything was set up like Monika always liked it for Club time... But Monika wasn't here, nor was Yuri.

There was a silence that fell between us.

"...I miss them..." Natsuki muttered, entering the room, running her hand over the blackboard, looking at it with such an eye, trying to see if this all was just a ruse or not.

I only hummed in reply, walking in and closing the door behind me.

It certainly felt a lot emptier than what I was used to. Usually Monika or Yuri would be here already, thumbing through a book, working on some homework or something else to keep themselves busy before the club officially started.

But those two weren't here yet.

"They still have a life to live." I piped up, wandering back into the class closet.

Natsuki slipped in underneath me and peeked in the one corner she always hid her Manga.

"Oh... Ohoooo!" She pulled out a box, inside was in fact, all the books she had hidden previously. "And here I was thinking I'd get bored!" She chimed, digging into all the books for something to immerse herself in.

"Why don't we take the whole box back to our room?" I suggested.

At first, Natsuki turned and looked at me like I was crazy before thinking for a moment and nodding.

"Actually.... Yeah, since I don't have to worry about... _him_ anymore..." She mused softly.

I smiled and turned to observe the rest of the room to see if there were any noticeable changes, leaving Natsuki to her devices for now.

The calendar was completely blank, which made me a bit confused. How exactly does time pass in the afterlife? Seems like something a bit too complicated for me to figure out. Philosophy wasn't really too much of a strength of mine. Usually I'd end up getting wrapped up in like, fifty different conspiracies.

"H-hey..."

I turned around. Natsuki seemed like she was having trouble carrying the entire box by herself. I had to stifle a giggle while I took the books off of her arms and into mine. 

Yeah, this was a bit heavier than expected. 

"I got it, I got it. I'll put it on the bed and you can slip it wherever you want when you get back."

"Oh, what? No, I'm coming with you."

"Ah, thank you! Could you get the door?"

"Yep!"

After a short moment we arrived back in the room. Our room, box in tow. Natsuki had me place it in a corner nearby the bed.

"Aaaugh, heavy..." I shook my arms, trying to get the sore out of them.

"Let's keep exploring! I wonder if there's anything else!" Natsuki chimed, already at the door.

I smiled and joined her. Her energy was quite infectious!

-*-

"That's... Definitely new." Natsuki murmured, looking out the school's front doors.

It was twilight by the looks of things. The school yard was completely different, the pavement gone, and replaced with dirt paths and a lot more nature. We both walked outside, looking around with wonder and wide eyes.

The school itself was slightly covered in vines and flowers. Honestly, it looked more beautiful than dilapidated.

"...Yyyeah...definitely new." Natsuki repeated.

Soft footsteps behind us caught our attention and we both whipped around, Natsuki stepping in front of me instinctively.

Two new faces, glanced between us, just as surprised as we were.

One was taller, short, messy brown hair and what seemed to be silver eyes, but it was slightly hard to tell in the darkness. They wearing a baggy sweater that they didn't care to zip up, along with jeans.

The other was smaller by a decent margin, hiding behind the taller one, sharing the brown hair and silver eyes, but hers being tied back into a ponytail. Siblings, I guess. She was wearing the elementary school uniform...

No one spoke for a bit, making the situation awkward and slightly tense... I cleared my throat.

"Eheh... Uhmm... Hi!" I waved with the friendliest smile I could manage.

The older sibling blinked before waving back with a small smile.

"I've...never seen you two around here before." They began. "I take it both of you recently..?"

I just nodded, kinda avoided eye contact.

The older sibling sighed, nodding in understanding.

"I'm sorry for your loss." They then sighed and held out a hand to the two of us.

"Tae." They said simply. Natsuki hesitated to grab the hand, so I took the initiative and shook it.

"Sayori! A pleasure!" I chimed, laughing awkwardly. Goshhhh, meeting new people is so scarryyyy!

"...Natsuki. Don't wear it out." She murmured, crossing her arms defensively.

Tae only smiled softly at Natsuki's thorns. "Good meeting the both of you." They replied before gently patting the younger one's head. "Go on, it's okay." They gently encouraged.

The younger one in question hid a bit more behind the leg of her older sibling, but spoke up in a soft, shaky voice. "I-I'm Riko..."

I knelt down to her level and waved at her with a smile on my face. How could I not? She was adorable!

"Hello, Riko!"

She waved back slowly. I stood up, satisfied.

"Little sister?" Natsuki asked.

"Yeah... We were...riding a bus. I was taking her home from school. Drunk driver wasn't watching the road, draw the line yourselves." Tae sighed, running a hand through their hair.

Both Natsuki and I frowned.

"Rough..." Natsuki murmured, loosening up a little. 

"That's so terrible!" I added.

Tae just shook their head, laughing softly.

"Don't feel sorry, though the sentiment is appreciated greatly, thank you. It's long past since then."

A moment of silence filled the void between us again.

"Well," Tae rubbed their hands together, "Since the two of you are new here, why don't I show you around? Feel free to tell me about your own stories, I'm curious, admitedly."

"Sure, I'll take you up on it!" Natsuki replied before I could.

-*-

Tae showed us to a nearby restaurant that wasn't there in life.

"As spirits, we don't really need to eat all to often, or at all, really, but most still crave food every once in a while. Hence the restaurant. It's all free so don't worry about paying." Tae explained

"Ooh! Can we stop by there later?" I asked, thinking some pancakes could really be nice around now.

"Certainly!" Tae flashed me a kind smile.

We departed and started walking down a street. I usually took this street to go to school...

"So...is this some modified replica of the real town?"

"Yes, as far as I know. Those who meet their end there also end up here. Most other spirits move on to different planes after a few years' worth of time, but Riko and I have stood here for a long time now. This town is full of fond memories..." They gazed longingly into the twilight sky. "That, and we're waiting for some friends of ours. It wouldn't sit right with neither me nor Koko here if we moved onto all that eternal smumber without our friends there with us."

Riko nodded softly, still hanging near her older sibling.

"...Do you think I could see... My mom again..?" Natsuki asked a bit softer than her usual tone.

Tae glanced at her for a moment before looking up into the sky again, shoving their hands into their pockets. 

"Perhaps. Many souls rest here, and beyond. Most in the beyond, but..." Tae returned their gaze to Natsuki. "I'm sure your mother will be around somewhere. I do hope you reunite with her eventually."

Natsuki nodded, staring down at the pavement. I gently rubbed her back and she gave me a small smile.

"Have you two been close for long?" Tae asks, tone soft and unintruding.

"Yeah, we've been friends for a while." I answered. "We were in the same small club with two other friends of ours."

They nodded, and the conversation faded to nothingness again. 

"...Hey, uh... What do you know about the Guide?" Natsuki piped up. 

"The Guide? Mmh..." Tae took a moment to think. "Not much is really known as far as I know. But they are kind hearted and sympathetic."

"Huh.." Natsuki hummed.

"Here we are." Tae piped up. 

Before us was a well, filled to the brim with glowing, glistening water. 

"This well will allow you to peer into the living world."

"Really??" I ran up and looked into the water. I really wanted to see how Monika and Yuri were doing!!

The water rippled and a scene started to form. 

White. A lot of it.

Monika was asleep in a chair, bags under her eyes, while Yuri in the bed next to her, eyes closed. 

...Actually, Nevermind...

I pushed away from the well. Natsuki looked at me worriedly before glancing into the well herself. She tensed up and turned away after a moment, closing her eyes. "...Let's get something to eat."

"Natsuki..."

"...We'll talk about it later, okay?" 

"...I...okay."

The trip back and the food went by quickly honestly. Riko chomped down a surprising amount of food for her size. 

Before I knew it, we were waving goodbye to Tae and Riko as they left us as our school. They waved back briefly before we turned and entered the building.

"...Monika looked so tired..." Natsuki murmured.

"Yuri..." I sighed... 

"I've never been so... Not wanting to see Yuri until now..."

In living, that would have been extremely rude, but in this situation, was completely understandable and honestly, I felt the same way. 

Seeing Yuri here would mean she would be dead. 

Leaving Monika alone... 

... 

I remember Monika texting me one night that the one thing she feared the most was being alone...

"...Hey, let's get some sleep, alright? Hell knows we need it." Natsuki offered, starting to walk down the hall towards the club, and our room.

I didn't respond and just followed.

All bundled up, it didn't take long for either of us to doze off. 

... 

I just hope the other two will be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Speaking of sleep, I somehow managed to legit sleep through the entire day, it's 2:02am here rn...
> 
> _**~~NEW RECORD!~~ ** _


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tbh, I've had chapters 3 and 4 typed out for a while. I've just been lazy Ehe, eheeee.... Heh...

"Everything's falling apart!"

I blinked, taking a step through the abyss... Just where was I..? The voice I was hearing was...agonizingly familiar..

"W-why couldn't I be there for them... Why couldn't I save them..."

...Monika.

I followed the sobs and cries of agony.

And..

There she was. Alone.

I approached quietly, kneeling down next to her. Several papers were scattered before the club president.

Some were familiar. Poems we've all written from our time in the club together.

Others were tests, grade sheets, quizzes.

Scores dangerously low.

Monika; Literature Club President, Ace Student, Candidate for Valedictorian...

Was failing class.

My breath hitched... I never thought she'd...

I slipped off the backpack I had been wearing apparently, and set it down in front of me, opening it and gently digging inside.

Monika didn't seem to notice I was there still.

I pulled out a cookie unrealistically large for any one person to consume, and snapped it in half, a few crumbs and chocolate chips littered the papers below.

The sound seemed to have caught my friend's attention and she slowly looked up to see me offering her a half of the pizza sized cookie.

I shot her a small smile.

-*-

Warm... I took in a deep, relaxed breath. Something smelt sweet... My arms were already wrapped around whatever this blessed thing was... Soft, warm, sweet...

Must be some treat from the heavens...

Maybe just one bite..?

...

" _ **H-HEY!!!!**_ "

The treat scrambled out of my arms and something slammed into my face.

The noise I made was less than spectacular.

I slowly opened my eyes and reached up to remove the book that had been chucked at me to reveal an angry, blushing, and flustered Natsuki with a faint bite mark on her shoulder.

....ah.

I was only able to offer a sorry, awkward grin...

Natsuki seemed to get even more flustered, snatching the pillow from beneath my head and slamming it into my face. Repeatedly. 

"N-Natsuki!! Mercy, please!!!"

"Not until I feel like you deserve mercy, you pervert!!"

I hopelessly rose my arms in a feeble attempt to defend myself from fluffy assault

"I-I didn't know!! I was still sleepinggg!!!"

One last smack.

"Honest?" She asked, looking down at me with a scrutinizing stink eye, rubbing her bitten shoulder.

"Honest, honest!!" I shot back, sitting up, holding both hands up in innocence.

She didn't seem satisfied, and after a moment, she pushed me back down onto the bed, pinning me down.

"N-Natsuki?!"

"You bit me... In the name of justice, I get to bite you back, meanie.."

"W-wha-- Natsuki, you can't be for real!!"

"Does this look like the face of mercy?"

I blinked and looked up at her.

She was blushing, avoiding eye contact, trying to keep her cool. Frankly it was more adorable than anything...

"Youuu...want me to answer that truthfully or..?"

I was greeted with another pillow to the face.

"Okay, okay, okay!! Sorry sorry!!"

Natsuki was trying to suppress a grin, I could see it. I was holding back giggles myself, honestly.

"You concede?"

"I concede! I surrender!"

"Good."

Natsuki seemed to hesitated a bit, her hands anxiously gripping my shirt's collar.

All of a sudden, she yanked it aside, and bit down on my shoulder, close to the neck.

The noise I made was a horrific mix between a yelp, gasp, and moan, feeling her hair tickle my cheek.

Just as quickly though she pulled away and shifted my collar back to its correct position, looking away, and avoiding eye contact while blushing furiously.

Granted, my own face felt like it was on fire.

Also I just realized Natsuki was straddling me--

She clamored off of me before I could finish my train of thought and rushed out the door, slamming it behind her.

I couldn't do much but lay there, stunned, confused, and flustered.

-*-

I sighed, musing around the club room, paging through a few papers I found.

They said stuff about the environment, some math problems, of which the page was littered with the number 64... Of all things.

Natsuki poked her head in, catching my attention.

"...Hey." Was all she spoke.

"...Heya." I replied.

The silence was kinda suffocating.

"Uhmm..sorry about earlier, I uh..."

"Oh! Oh, aha, nono, don't worry about it!" I wove off her worries. "Think nothing of it!"

Natsuki seemed to relax a bit, walking into the room.

"So, I did some more wandering and, turns out, the School's kitchen is fully functional."

"Oh, really?"

"Yeah, and I was wondering if that one gas station is still there. Maybe we could go grab some stuff and maybe whip something up ourselves!"

"I mean, that sounds nice and all, but isn't there a restaurant just out there..?"

"Well, yeah, duh, but it's less for the food and more for the cooking, you know?"

"Ah, right, right...I've never been able to cook anything more than some ramen, Ehe"

"Hey, I could teach you!" She chimed excitedly.

Learning how to cook? Sounds exciting and all, but did I really trust myself with a stove..? Or anything cooking related? A microwave was the bare minimum...

"I mean... I guess I'm up for it." I shrugged. "Can we go later though? My energy's not cooperating right now..."

"Oh, uh, yeah, that's fine. Gives me some time to read some more." Natsuki left the club and returned after a few moments with a book in her hands.

The same book that smacked me in the face earlier.

Natsuki settled down in her usual spot in the room and flipped open the story.

Meanwhile, a nap sounds extremely nice right now. Maybe a few minutes...

...Just a few...

...

...

"Aaaand this is the club room. Our club room. And uh, don't mind Sayo, she's just being herself." Natsuki's voice echoed in my head.

What was she talking about?

"Ah. She was energetic last night. Surprising to see her snoozing here."

Wait, was that Tae?

I slowly rose my head, cause in this state of groggy stupor, everything felt like twenty times heavier.

Sure enough there was Natsuki showing Tae and their little sister around the club room.

How long was I asleep..? Is it seriously evening already..? The setting sun seemed to imply so...

Natsuki turned around to show them the next area of interest and noticed my bleary eyes.

"Oh, uh, hey, Sayo. We uh, didn't wake you up did we?"

"Nono, it's alright... Is it seriously evening already..?"

Tae shook their head. "Not exactly. The sky seems to be constantly twilight. There's no real reliable way to tell time, given that clocks and watches of the sort don't seem to work correctly either."

"...Oh. Sooo... How long was I asleep..?"

"Bout... What, 1, 2, 3 hours? Roughly?"

"...Well, heck..." I sighed, leaning back in my chair. "Well, it's not like we're in a rush or anything nowadays, since we're... Well... Dead."

"I'm aware, but... Afterlife or not, sleeping all day is still unhealthy." Tae gave me a sympathetic look. I just laughed awkwardly.

"Excuse me..."

Everyone turned to the door.

"Ah, The Guide." Tae smiled.

The Specter gave a polite nod in thanks.

"Tae. Riko. A relief to see you two doing well." The Guide then turned to Natsuki and I. "As for you two, I bring bittersweet news."

That alone made the room drop a few degrees in temperature.

"...Who...who is it..?" Natsuki asked, tone dull and deflated.

The Guide seemed to weigh the decisions for a moment before sighing.

"Yuri." Natsuki and I shared a glance. It looked like Natsuki knew it was going to be our quiet tea loving friend, but didn't want to admit it. Or believe it. "She will be here within the next few hours, so please take the time to prepare for her arrival. I do not think she'll be quite... Ecstatic."

A moment of silence followed. I decided to pipe up finally. Someone had to.

"We'll do our best. Thank you for being considerate."

The Guide smiled at me. If that skull could smile.

"In the transition from one state to the next, the one thing a soul needs is to be cared for. No matter how major nor minor the shift, a change beckons support."

With that, the Guide left the room.

"Is... There anything I can do to help?" Tae asked, fidgeting with the zipper on their baggy sweater.

"Me too...I wanna help too..." Riko murmured softly, getting a surprised, but fond expression from her older sibling.

"We'll do what we can." Tae smiled at me, encouragingly.

I looked to Natsuki. Natsuki sighed before pulling out a piece of paper and a pencil.

"Now then, we're gonna need a game plan, gang."


	5. Chapter 5

Natsuki shifted awkwardly, glancing warily at the tea pot. It was obvious she was worried about the beverage she brewed herself from her limited knowledge of the art; most of which came from Yuri's fond ramblings that had stuck in her brain.

Likewise, me and the other two were exchanging glances between one another.

Yuri hadn't said a word since she got here.

She was just sitting here, resting her elbow on the table, idly swirling the tea cup in her other free hand. The book we chose for her hadn't been touched yet either.

That was the big red flag.

...

...

I shifted a bit before sitting down next to our newly departed friend.

"S-soooo... Ah... How're... How're you feeling, Yuri?" I asked, trying to keep the awkward out of my voice, but, that was next to impossible.

Yuri paused a moment, glancing at me through the corner of her eye before going back to staring blankly at the now lukewarm tea.

"E-eheee... Y-You know, the tea's gonna be cold soon... Natsuki worked really hard to make it right just for you..."

Yuri didn't even flinch. I swore her eyes narrowed a bit.

"...Yuri, come on... Both Natsuki and I know well enough you're not much of a talker, bu--"

Yuri slammed the tea cup back onto its saucer, standing up with such force, the chair she was sitting on fell backwards. Everyone in the room jumped in fear.

Yuri was breathing heavily as she turned to me with... The most crazed expression I've ever seen on anyone, much less her.

"...Y-Yur--"

"It was all because of you." She muttered. 

"W-wha--"

"It was all because of you!" Yuri repeated, approaching me aggressively, and next thing I knew I was pinned against the wall.

"Do you know how hard Monika worked to get enough money to pay for your funeral?! Do you know how many nights she crumpled under stress, exhaustion, sadness, loneliness, because all of her free time was spent working job, after job, after job, after job! All to afford your little funeral!"

I blinked blankly in response.

"She blamed herself! She always blamed herself for your suicide! She didn't feel like she was there for you enough! That if she were around just a bit more, you wouldn't have gone and hung yourself!"

...

"And just when Monika started working her behind off, Natsuki disappeared!" Yuri, turned her head angrily at Natsuki.

"Wha-- Disappeared?! _Disappeared?!??_ " She shot back, her face red with Fury...

Oh dear...

"When you stopped showing up to school, Monika started to freak out! Thought she was going to be abandoned! She visited me in the hospital every midnight by sneaking in through the window to even get a moment to spend with her last friend while she worked her ass off day in and day out!"

"You think that was _MY_ fault?! My own fucking dipshit of a dad killed me! Like I could do anything about that!! Plus!! If you're so concerned about Monika, then how come you're here?!"

"Is that any of your business?!"

"How is it not?!"

"How I died is not relevant!"

"It's completely relevant, you idiot!!! You were the only one Monika had left, and now she's fucking alone!!! Just like you said!!"

Yuri hesitated, letting out a low growl between barred teeth.

"Don't... You dare talk about me like that."

"Oh, oh I so do dare!! In fact, I dare a fuck ton! We were all supposed to be friends!! And here you are blaming us for our own deaths?!" Natsuki took a step around Yuri and pushed her away from me, shoving herself between me and her...

"If you're going to be so selfish as to blame us when you're equally at fault for your own points, then you can kindly escort yourself out that fucking door!" Natsuki pointed angrily at the club door.

Yuri blinked, her rage fueled facade cracked a moment...

"...Yuri..." I spoke up. Natsuki looked like she was about to tell me to stop but shit her mouth. "... I'm... I'm aware that what I did was... Naive... Instead of looking for support from my friends, I... Decided to handle it all myself, like I've always done... Until I found you all..." I took a shaky breath, trying to hold back my tears. "...I've never, ever meant to abandon you, Natsuki, or Monika... I... Only wished the best for all of you, and I felt like... Me not being there would've been for the better, but... Now... Now I understand the severity of the choice I made..."

"S-sayo, you shouldn't feel sorry... You were in a tight spot with no way out..."

I smiled softly at Natsuki.

"Yet I do." I replied simply. Natsuki paused at that reaction.

The room went silent.

"I... I need a moment alone..." Yuri muttered, not making eye contact with either of us before quietly excusing herself from the room.

Once the door shut and the footsteps faded, Natsuki let out a frustrated sigh

"Well, that was a shit fest..."

Someone cleared their throat and we turned to look at Tae, who was both concerned, and covering the ears of Riko, who looked quite terrified.

"...Fffffff...iddlesticks..." Natsuki murmured and Tae gave a small nod of thanks before removing their hands.

I walked up to Riko who reflexively hid behind her sibling... I just knelt down a comfortable distance away.

"Hey, sorry, Riko... This honestly isn't what usually happens. Well, I mean, those two" I gestured towards Natsuki. "Usually do argue a lot, but it's about... More sillier topics. This is the first time I've seen Yuri this... Hostile." I sighed, saying that to myself more than her.

Natsuki had her arms crossed, keeping her gaze locked on the door.

"Natsuki, please just, leave her alone for now. She'll come around."

The pink haired girl just sighed in resignation and sat down in what was supposed to be Yuri's seat, picking up the cup of tea she had brewed and staring down at it, as if it held the secrets to all of her problems.

"...It's cold..." She murmured, obviously disappointed.

"...Oh, why not salvage it with some ice?" Tae asked. Natsuki looked up at them.

"And what, make it colder? Yuri always talked about temperature with this stuff..."

"You...haven't heard of iced tea before..?"

"...I think once or twice..."

Tae shot her a kind smile, and offered to walk to the door.

"Why don't we get some ice from the School's kitchen? I'll accompany you."

"...S-su...fine.." She sighed, getting up and taking the pot of brewed tea with her. 

"Riko?" Tae turned to the kid, who joined the other two.

"Sayo, c'mon. Let's go. I'd like to be anywhere but here right now, honestly."

I gave her a small nod and joined the party.

-*-

Besides a few stray smiles and laughs here and there, Natsuki had been pretty distant while we made our pilgrimage to the kitchen.

I'll be honest, I've never seen the inside of the school's kitchen before. Natsuki and Tae dug around for some ice in that massive freezer vault thing while I kept Riko company outside.

"So, how have you been holding up, Riko?" I asked, sitting on a counter. The girl glanced up at me timidly before shuffling awkwardly.

"I've been...good, yes... Your tall friend is kind of scary..."

I sighed running a hand through my hair. "Yeah, I understand why you'd think that. She's wound up tighter than an alarm clock, so I guess it was a few moments before she snapped... Normally, she's very quiet and kind. I think you'd like her, since when she's not having an absolutely terrible day, you two share some similarities."

Riko just hummed.

"You read books..?"

"Yes. Tae had been teaching me since... We got here before I could finish learning."

I took in a sharp breath.

"Ooh...yeah, that's poopy..."

"But I do enjoy reading now that I can... There's just a few big words that confuse me..."

I gave her a small smile.

"Yeah, you two would get along quite well, I think."

The big vault door nudged open.

"It took way more looking than it needed to, but we got ice, ladies!" Natsuki held up a bucket of the cold stuff.

-*-

"Now, my knowledge on tea is limited, but I do think that certain teas take more to ice than others. Which is to say, you can't make a good iced tea by chucking cubes into some random cup."

"Yeah, yeah, makes sense."

"And I'll admit, I have no idea what you used to brew this."

"Mmmmm yeah, me neither."

Everyone shot Natsuki a wary expression.

"What..? You expect me to be some magical tea expert or something?! All I know is that most of the stuff I used came from those little tea bag things!"

Tae shrugged, nestling the tea pot into the ice bucket.

"Well, there is only one way to find out untimately."

We all stared blankly at the bucket.

"...Well, any clever ideas to kill time?" Natsuki asked after a moment too long. 

-*-

"I still have no idea how you shoehorned me into this..." Natsuki sighed, peeking into a pot on the stove, waiting for it to boil. I just laughed lightly. Tae and Riko were busy gathering ingredients from around the place. 

"Hey, just like they said, it's not too great to be laying around doing nothing all day, so I just thought, 'Hey, why not have you teach everyone here how to cook? It'll be fun, and productive!'"

Natsuki sighed, shaking her head, but she didn't hide her small smile.

"I mean, you _are_ the best cook I know." I added for some extra emphasis. Natsuki turned away before I could get a good gauge on her reaction.

"W-whatever. I'll teach you dummies... Only because the pot's almost at boiling anyways.."

I only grinned wider.

My friend seemed like she was about to scold an ear off before a soft clearing of the throat caught our attention. It wasn't Tae or their sister.

Yuri was standing at the door way, awkwardly fiddling with her fingers and avoiding eye contact.

"A-ah...uhhm... Is... Is it okay if I join you all..?"

Natsuki and I traded glances.

"Of course Yuri! You're always welcome to join us!" I chimed.

"As long as you don't yell at us, I guess..."

The purple haired girl looked relieved and took a step into the kitchen, giving us all an apologetic smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tbh I have a whole mess of projects I want to work on but I have no idea how to execute them all in a tasteful manner...
> 
> Examples include:  
> -Girls Frontline  
> \---Coffee Shop AU  
> \--- ~~Destiny 2 guns lmao AU or pulling one into the Canon present~~  
>  \---Something else cause tbh, GF verse is super interesting  
> -Azur Lane  
> \---No specific ideas, but a small few fics really kick me in the inspiration behind.  
> -More that I probably can't think of as of rn cause am lazy.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise!
> 
> I didn't forget about this!

"I am aware that what I've said was extremely rude and far out of line..." Yuri sighed, poking at the bowl of fresh spectral Mac and cheese delivered before her, courtesy of Tae and Riko.

"I forgive you!" I chirped out almost immediately, almost getting a surprised expression from the purple haired girl.

"W-wh...after all I said to you?"

I just nodded. "Yup, even after all of that! I know that you were suuuuper worked up and more than stressed. We all just wanted to try and make your arrival here a bit less.... Mmmh..."

"Jarring?" Tae offered.

"Yeah, jarring."

Yuri hesitated, obviously mulling through how to reply. "...I...don't really know what to say... Except for the fact that I am genuinely sorry for earlier... But... All that aside, it all still doesn't change the fact that Monika..." She trailed off, but Natsuki and I already know what she was pointing towards.

"...All we can do is wait. I know she's a strong girl. We all do, really. I just hope Monika will be able to forgive us for leaving her like that..."

"Hey, enough of that Sayori. Now c'mon, eat! Those two didn't cook for us under my masterful teaching for nothing!" Natsuki gestured widely with her fork, emphasizing on both Tae and Riko.

Without another word, we all dug into the meal, and lemme say, it's nice to know that even in the afterlife, MacCheesy is still the amazingest when it's fresh from the stove!

"Goodness me, I haven't tasted a meal like this for a while..." Tae muttered, taking a small sip of the iced tea that Natsuki had offered.

"Sooo, uh, how's the tea..?"

"It's... Well, I'm no tea connoisseur, but it's relatively tasteful in my opinion." They gave Natsuki a soft smile.

Yuri was next to give her drink a try.

"...Natsuki, this tea is..."

"Cold? Yeah, I get it."

"N-no...I don't mind iced tea at all, but... It's... Sweeter than what I was anticipating."

"Hey, if I'm gonna be drinking leaf juice soup stuff, it's gotta be better than just bland bitter hotness!"

"Your taste buds are spoiled with sugar. There are many minute nuances and hidden flavors that you are missing. A squeeze of lemon, for example."

"Yeah yeah, just say you don't like it already and rip off the band-aid, geez." Natsuki huffed, crossing her arms and looking away from the table.

"...While I did say that the flavor was not something I was... Expecting, I never said I disliked it, Natsuki... In fact, I'd go as far to say that sweet tea fits you."

Natsuki glanced back at Yuri, leaning forward with a menacing expression.

"So what is it then, Lady Leaf Soup? Do you like it or hate it. Stop cookie cutting and get to the point."

Yuri sighed, rubbing her forehead gently.

"...Yes, while I normally forgo sweet tea, yours is something I can see myself drinking occasionally. Like I said, sweet tea is very you. Both in taste and metaphorically."

Natsuki let out a breath, rolling her eyes and plopping back into her chair.

"Right, metaphors, you love those little shiiiii....ps. Ships. Little ships." Natsuki glanced towards Tae, who was stifling a giggle.

Yuri also had a tough time holding I some genuine laughter, but continued nonetheless.

"Metaphorically, you and sweet tea are similar in the fact that you're both sweet, and the undertone of bitterness corresponds with your... Erhm... Cold and abrasive attitude. Of course there are many other lines I could draw, but, I'm going off on a tangent, and the food is getting cold, and I'd very much like to eat."

"Ah...right...ehe...yeah."

Natsuki and Yuri were both hiding blushes.

-*-

Tae and Riko had headed on off, so Natsuki and I took the opportunity to sort out our room business.

The bed was far more than enough for three of us. It could probably hold five comfortably, honestly, and though Yuri was mildly put off with sharing a bed, albeit, an extremely large one, with other girls, especially friends, but she agreed nonetheless, and we worked on making a bit of space for her own corner of the room.

Since we're apparently sharing one big room, it'd be nice to have some spaces where it could just be for us.

After a bit of sorting and gathering some keepsakes from the club room, Yuri settled onto the bed and stared up at the ceiling while Natsuki was cooped up in her little corner, lounging on a beanbag while reading one of her numerous Manga issues.

Meanwhile, I was also sitting on a bed, hugging onto a pillow as I silently sorted through all the events today and took some time to process everything.

Yuri was here with us now. It's upsetting to think that basically our entire club had died prematurely one way or another. Monika was the only one left on the mortal coil, and almost none of us have any guess on how she'll handle it all.

I thought back to my dream earlier... Monika, failing classes... If I ever heard she was failing classes at any other time, I would've assumed someone was spewing fallacies left and right, but... It's safe to assume that her life had basically crumbled before her...

I want to see her again... I want to see her smile and laugh like she always does during our time at the club. Where she wasn't Monika, Ace Student, but Monika, Dorky Friend... The Monika who would always try her best to make sure we were all happy, and getting along. The Monika that was there for me until the end, the one that was always encouraging Yuri, the one that was always teasing Natsuki playfully, only to have both of them wheezing from laughter over something completely unrelated.

I want...

I want Monika.

She may not forgive us when she finally does arrive, but... As long as I can see her beautiful smile one more time...

As long as I get to have that adorable giggle grace my ears once more...

...

"...Sayori?" Yuri's concerned tone shattered the stagnant silence that blanketed the room.

"Ah..?" I glanced at her to realize my vision was inexplicably blurry... I reactively wiped my eyes, wiping away tears I never realized were there.

"Is everything alright..?" Yuri asked, pausing a moment before backtracking "Well, I mean, as fine as being in the spiritual recreation of life as we know it can be?"

Natsuki held in a snicker, obviously listening in, but stubbornly kept her gaze on the Manga in front of her.

"Yeah, it's fine... As fine as being dead can be, yeah..." I murmured, feeling the weight of one particular word.

Dead.

We were all dead.

We all had to deal with that fact. There was no changing it.

It's hard to stay cheerful when one faced it.

"I missed you all... I still miss her..." I plopped backwards onto the bed with a hefty 'fwumph'.

The room fell silent again.

"...Yuri, you never did tell us..."

"...About...how..."

"Mmh..." I only nodded, not having enough energy to sit up and look at her.

"...I suppose I do owe an explanation..." She paused, taking a deep breath. "It was a few months after Natsuki had...met her fate." Yuri made a gesture. The girl in question was trying to hide her attention to the topic.

"I had been discharged with a heavy recommendation to see a councilor for my...erhm...quirk."

"Your cutting..." Natsuki murmured softly. Yuri closed her eyes, sighing with a nod.

"Monika had taken the moment to celebrate, taking us to a Cafe with what little money she had left... I insisted she use it for more wiser expenses, but she stubbornly insisted, in her typical 'Monika Fashion'. But it also turns out that, in a terrible streak of bad luck, the hospital I was discharged from had a coincidental, and horrific mix up in paperwork and management... I believe I passed out, due to blood related circumstances, of which I'm... Unable to recall."

Yuri's eyes failed to meet anyone's and settled on the bed beneath her.

"...I think I hit my head on something on the way down... The bleeding was severe from what little I can remember..."

"Wait, how could you tell if you were passed out?" Natsuki asked, tone full of confusion. 

"That is beyond me. It confuses me as much as it does you, believe me... Regardless... The Guide had appeared before me. I had died in the ambulance on the way back to that same malfunctioning hospital."

The room feel too stuffy...

"Do you think there would be... More people here too then..? A hospital having that massive of a fuck up..."

"...I don't know how much people wander these streets, but I did see a few crestfallen faces here and there on my walk to...calm myself."

Natsuki and I traded glances.

"The only people we've seen besides us were just Tae and Riko." I murmured after a moment.

A stagnant silence fell upon the room.

"Well, anyways! Let's get some rest! We can always see if anything interesting's changed tomorrow! Or uh... Later or something. Since time is weird here and all." I offered, laughing awkwardly. Yuri seemed to agree, while Natsuki simply went back to reading her Manga. We're spirits and all, so I guess it'll be fine to leave her be... 

I flopped back onto the bed and let out a long sigh. Today was something interesting... 

I wonder what tomorrow will bring...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tbh I'm probably gonna wrap this up soon-ish so I can focus more on Daybreak, as well as a handful of other smaller projects that may or may not grow into a gargantuan like most of my projects tend to do, soooo...


	7. Chapter 7

I blinked my eyes open...

What just happened..?

...I vaguely remembered panic... I looked around at the chaos around me.

Lights, blaring sirens... In the middle of a road.

Oh. I remember now.

"...Monika." An unfamiliar voice murmured behind me. I didn't react. All I saw was the mess before me. My body was on the ground. Broken.

There was silence, but there wasn't silence. I could hear what was going on, but it was as if it were all coming from the other side of a house...

The more I stared at the scene, the more I remembered about my demise...

I whipped around, trying to spot a certain someone.

A small child was bawling their eyes out, next to their father who was gently comforting the kid.

Good... They're safe.

"A tragic, but noble end..." The voice spoke up again. I finally turned around to face it.

A spectral skill for a face, massive, black flowing cape, not unlike a void... I had an idea on who this was already.

"Because of you, a child and father lives to see another day. I'm more than sure that they will be forever grateful."

"...I don't know why that dad was making such a risky cross..." Were the first words out of my mouth since this happened.

Trying to cross the street during such a busy time... I'd managed to shove them out of the way in time but...

My head pulsed with sharp pain, stopping my train of thought.

"Regardless of decisions made, a life saved, is a life cherished."

I didn't respond. I honestly didn't know how to feel about being dead...

"When you are ready to leave this scene behind, I'm sure you have a few friends that miss you dearly."

A... Few friends..?

I looked that skull in their nonexistent eyes.

"You don't mean..?"

The eyes closed somehow, and it gave a sage nod.

"But I do."

The cape parted as if an arm had pulled a portion aside. A bright light was revealed. It looked to be a door almost..?

I hesitated, but a gently push was all I needed to see.

The first things I saw: Sapphire eyes. Radiant smile.   
The first things I smelt: Tea. Tea, Ink, and Cupcakes.  
The first things I felt: Warm hands, and warm winds.  
The first things I tasted: Dry mouth, stuck tounge. Overflowing emotions...

 

The first things I heard:

"It's been far too long, Monika"   
"Took you long enough, Prez."  
"Monika... Welcome to our club... And... I'm sorry."

-*-

"...Sayori, what did you apologize for..?" 

I hesitated. Monika deserves to know...

"Back when I... Left everyone behind..."

"...Oh, Sayo..."

"I felt like... You'd resent me for leaving you... I... I remembered you confided in me, you hated being alone, and I was the first one to leave you! I shouldn'tve... I was just... It was so.... So hard..."

"Sayori... I don't resent you at all. In fact, I missed you... I've missed all of you" 

Monika gestured to the whole group.

"It's been... What... Almost 5 or 6 years since... Then..."

"It has?" Natsuki piped up. "It's only felt like a few months here."

"Time adheres to laws beyond our comprehension I suppose." Yuri sighed.

Monika only smiled, tears in her eyes. 

"It's nice to know none of you have changed at all..."

"...I feel like we have, but..." Sayori laughed softly. "I guess death does that."

-*-

"So, you're Monika? I've heard far too much." The new face laughed, offering a hand.

"My reputation precedes me. Only good things I hope." I took the hand and gave a friendly shake.

"Radiant things. Once she got going, Sayori would shower us with only glowing compliments about you." 

"Taeee" 

"And, this is from my own mouth, but maybe take her out to eat sometime."

"Tae!!" Sayori whined, shaking her friend out of their smug expression with a red face. 

I blinked and thought a short moment about what they had meant.

Why take Sayori out to eat..? Plus, why was she... Oh.

Oh, I see...

Tae only laughed harder as they saw my face match Sayori's own hue.

Thank goodness Natsuki and Yuri decided to wander off on their own. I don't think I could've taken much more teasing...

"Onee-chii..." The little girl that always stuck with Tae gently tugged on their shirt. "You're the only one laughing.."

Tae gently pat the smaller girl's head, calming themselves down. "My bad, my bad. You're right, Riko."

I didn't pay much more attention to the two siblings, opting to look at Sayori instead.

When did she start...? Liking me..?

More so, I'm glad she didn't stop... We've got years of catch up to do...

I offered a hand to Sayori who was initially caught off guard, but shyly grasped mine with her own. I have a gentle reassuring squeeze.

"Well, Sayori and I have more than a few years to catch up on, Tae. It's been a pleasure to meet you." I smiled back at them, gently gesturing Sayori towards the school. Or what was the school at least.

"Of course, of course. Riko, do you want to look for Yuri and Natsuki?"

The little girl hummed with a few nods. Tae gave us a small wave as the two left to find the other two members of the club. We returned the gesture before retreating into the building that new served as our own new residence.

There's been a lot to take in. No doubt.

But a small, blushing smile from Sayori is all I needed to feel okay.

"...I'm not leaving you alone like that ever again, Monika."

A fond smile.

Cute tears.

"I wouldn't doubt you. Not even for a second, Sayori."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm rly tired, but tadah... I guess.


End file.
